Sex Quotes

Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
– Steve Martin

A girl’s legs are her best friends, but the best of friends must part.
– Redd Foxx (from Comedy Album – Huffin and Puffin)

Sex is better than talk…Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.
– Woody Allen (Hollywood Ending, 2002)

I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, ‘the man goes on top and the woman underneath’. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds.
– Joan Rivers

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range.
– Scott Roeben

I believe that sex is the most beautiful, natural, and wholesome thing that money can buy.
– Steve Martin

There’s a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what’s the problem?
– Phyllis Diller

My girlfriend always laughs during sex — no matter what she’s reading.
– Steve Jobs

During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.
- Rodney Dangerfield

You’re only as old as the woman you feel.
- Grouch Marx

God gave us a penis and a brain, but not enough blood to use both at the same time.
- Robin Williams

Men would pay to have sex, but women don’t unless they are paid.
- My old, old boyfriend

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